** I used to have this 'unpublished blog' (which I called My Confession Room) where i pour out some of the things that i have in mind. And this write-up which I wrote on 7th October, 2009 is one of those. **
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Inasmuch as I would like to avoid counting the days nearing Godwin’s departure, I just couldn’t help it. There are a lot things that keep me tied to that thought every single day and if I’d give you all of them, I’ll just be counting again… sigh.
And so yes, this entry is all about counting…
As of September 29th of this year, it’s officially my third year in Convergys. I lasted for three straight years with the company without even counting. I can still remember how many times I’ve planned leaving and when it’s about to happen, something good would always happen to me in Convergys career-wise. To start off, it was August of 2007 when Godwin talked me into applying in ACS (a call center in Lipa where he was working at that time). I immediately liked the idea because of 1) it is not anymore that distant from home (Taysan) and 2) I’ll be closer to him, Godwin. So I did go as a walk-in applicant. I passed the initial interview and the assessments. I was already scheduled for a final interview when Godwin told me how badly he wanted to get out of that company. My mind at that time, of course whirled so fast, thinking, “what am I supposed to do there if he’s not there anymore?” Then he said, just wait for him and he’ll find a job in Alabang, to be near me. The idea of him and me together in a place far from our home was indeed interesting let alone exciting. So indeed, that proposal was of course, very surprising not to mention yet touching and unquestionably wonderful. And he did actually get a job here, at APAC, while I… well; we suddenly had an opening for cyber intern. And I thought to myself, “This, at last is the escape I’ve been waiting for!” –it ain’t easy to take in calls every day, so if there’s any way I could get out of it, I’d grab it. And so it happened. Instead of leaving the company by August of 2007, I got accepted as a cyber intern and so the counting of months for my internship begun.
They said that cyber internship usually only lasts for two to a max of three months. Well, hola! We started in August of 2007 and only got transferred to fulltime Cyber in February of 2008. And that is so YES – yes, we did break the record! (Seesh) So that’s what? That’s six months of waiting and counting. When I finally got to the real world of Cyber, the management, in a very wrong timing, had to make an awfully nerve-wracking, annoyingly life-changing decision. We ran out of emails to process. Yes. After just being promoted to the higher level, they’d need to throw us away like disposable cups. Argh! They started throwing 10 up to 20 old cyber peepz – they (the MANAGEMENT) threw them back to the most hated department of our account – the Mainbank (where all you’d do is to take in calls the whole shift – good luck!) which is now called BGI or billing and general inquiries. Fortunately, they threw us (the newest in cyber) to a department not so well known to us, a department I’ve never wished before to be a part of and yet the department I seriously love today – BACKOFFICE now called Account Management Team.
I was transferred to BackOffice just a month after being officially crowned as a fulltime cyber, which only means, it happens in March of 2008. They told us that the action made was just gonna be temporary. We could still go back to cyber after let’s say 4 months or depending on the email volume. Well, that never happened. For the first 3-4 months of our stay in BackOffice, I can’t help counting how many more days, weeks and months before I could get back to what I was trained up for – to be a fulltime cyber. Obviously, all the counting just remained counting as we didn’t get to return to the email department where we all thought we belong to.
Good thing though, I got familiarized with the policies and procedures of BackOffice until I learned to love it and eventually forgot all the counting…
Until one day… after Godwin left APAC to accept a brighter future in MACQUARIE which happened in June of this year (if I’m not mistaken), I suddenly felt the need to join the flow of his victory. I felt the need to find a job in Makati immediately. It was actually already in my plan before but wishfully after I have gotten my 13th month pay for this year and my SL conversions. However, it seems that the situation could no longer wait for me or for my plans. The worst part is, I still love what I do in Convergys even if it may not pay as competitive as other call centers (well I actually don’t know coz I’ve been in the same company for the past 3yrs...).
Again, the counting in my mind is back, ticking like a clock. It’s like a bomb that would explode if the ticking won’t stop any sooner. It’s draining me of my strength. I feel feeble and restless. With each passing day, I can’t take away the fact that Godwin would soon leave this room, which I’ve considered our little house, to get a more comfortable place to stay in and a place that’ll be much nearer to his workplace. Unfortunately, the two applications I had with two different companies in Makati and in Taguig both came home with no good results. No better job offer waiting and soon no Godwin coming home from work. He’ll soon start looking for the perfect place to move in to and by that, the counting in my head will begin again until maybe, either me or my brain get tired of it… and just stop, lifeless…
Sigh. I’m sorry for being too sentimental today. I just checked my email awhile back and noticed that no matter how many job links are there waiting to be clicked, there just ain’t one that suits me. In fact, I even got very reluctant to even click on one. Yeah, I got frustrated with SALMAT and MACQUARIE. I know it is their loss because they just missed their chance of having the most brilliant employee they could ever have, hah! But you know, let’s accept it. Sometimes, it wouldn’t matter whether you’re good or not if the timing isn’t right. I really thought I could make all of these work – Godwin moving to Makati to be nearer to his workplace and me moving with him to start a new job there. Evidently, it didn’t work that way and I guess inasmuch as I would like to avoid this reality, I just couldn’t.
It’s me here… counting again while trying to face reality no matter how bad it bites… I’ll see you again, next time, same room…
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